Some material may not be suitable for children.

"Mom, did you know that the worst, scariest movies are rated S?"

"X? Who told you about X-rated movies!?" Once again, I misunderstood my son. I'm sure I'm going deaf. Note to self, order Miracle-Ear.

"S! S! Rated S! They're really awful movies. It's the worst rating you can have."

"S? I'm pretty sure there's no such rating."

"For real. There IS!"

Oh, I forgot. A six-year old is always right. And, the only way to prove him wrong is to Google it. It was 7am. No one had breakfast. Everyone's hair still looked like we were at a Bon Jovi concert. I shrugged, started humming "You Give Love a Bad Name," and fired up the laptop.

"G. PG. PG-13. R. NC-17. See? No S." (And, no X either, by the way. Isn't X a real rating?)

"They must not have added S yet. It must be new," Madan offered up.

Of course it must be new. Because to be otherwise would mean you're wrong, Madan, and a six-year-old is never wrong. I decided to play along with my little Roger Ebert. "Okay. What is sooooo bad about an S-rated movie?"

"It has grown-ups and kissing. IT'S TERRIBLE! A kid at school told me about it."

Madan had a serious look of worry about him. I could see the ulcer growing in his stomach. Even though I'm deaf, I could hear his brain screaming, "Why would anyone film two people kissing? GROSS! I don't want to see that!"

"Don't worry, Madan. You don't have to go see an S-rated movie. Ever."

Relief washed over his face.

Some material may not be suitable for children, I guess.