D'OH! I wish she missed the bus.

I am getting a ski mask. No, not because it's so cold out and no, not because I'm going to hit up a 7-11. That would be like robbing my uncle. I need it for disguise. I considered wigs, moustaches and face paint, but a ski mask seems more practical this time of year. Besides, an Indian woman with a moustache isn't much of a disguise. It's every day living and the reason why Nair will never go out of business.

So, why the ski mask? My daughter is hell bent on making sure I lose friends faster than I make them. It's not her fault, really. It's mine. I'm a horrible parent who knows no boundaries. You see, awhile back, I made the mistake of calling her attention to school buses. I compounded the mistake by telling her she'd be riding the short one. I won't go into the reasons why, but let's just say at one point I thought she was lucky to be so cute and I started telling her about the bars where Quarterbacks hang out.

(Kaila, if you're older now and have found my blog, please know I am 100% joking. Seriously. Please do not put me in that awful nursing home. I will change my will to an 80/20 split between you and Madan. Pinky swear. Besides. He never helped me empty the dishwasher and fold laundry like you did. And, this morning he pulled my robe up in front of the window, exposing me to the new neighbors.)

So, I took Kaila to preschool this morning. It's an awesome place that has many special needs classes. As we were walking through the parking lot, she noticed a line of buses. She stopped, her mouth dropped in awe.

"MOM!" she said pointing excitedly.

"What, honey?" I replied.

"LOOK! LOOK! Is THAT the SHORT bus? Right there! It is! THE SHORT BUS!"

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. I quickly inventoried the parking lot. Luckily, the one Hindu god who still takes pity upon me must have intervened. No one heard her. Or, at least I couldn't see anyone who might have heard her.

I scooted Kaila along and said something idiotic like, "Um all school buses are alike. Some just hold more kids than others." and "Let's not talk about the length of school buses again. Ever."

I sensed Kaila reaching for the "why" Uzi. Before she had time to hit me with her trademark rapid-fire questioning, I sprung into action.

"Hey Kaila! Look at that! Doesn't that pile of snow look like a bunny? Wow! That is so cool!"

Man, was I reaching. But, it worked. Thankfully, four year olds are easily distracted. Next time, I'll make sure we miss the bus.