Chuck Up Your Cheese

Why do kids love Chuck E. Cheese so much? For the same reason they have to touch everything in a public restroom. They love things that make us cringe.

Yesterday, we went to a birthday party at the pizza hizzouse. We walked in. I was overwhelmed. The kids took their tokens and took off. I spent the next hour chasing them as they shoved coins into anything and everything. I even witnessed one kid trying to jam a token into the ticket chomper. I tried reasoning with him, but he wasn't having it. So, I stood and watched, interested to learn what might happen. He was persistent, but the ticket chomper refused to bite down on his gold biscuit so away he ran in search of something else to do -- or break.

The chaos that Chuck E.'s classifies as wholesome family entertainment intrigues me. It's more like kids gone wild. Each time I'm there, I witness rugrats running amok, screaming at the top of their lungs in the tunnel or doing something else that requires some disciplinary action or jail time. During the party, a friend directed my attention to a full-scale assault being launched on Chuck E. Evidently, some young punks thought storming the stage and beating the snot out of the singing mouse was a rite of passage. They're lucky they chose the fake rat. The costumed one would have smacked 'em back. And, I would have given him a standing O.

And, it's not just the kids you have to watch. It's the mamas, too. Kaila was blindsided by a booty. It came out of no where...fast. I tried to push my baby out of the way and save her. But, I wasn't quick enough. The mama bent over and rear-ended Kaila into the Honey Bee Hive. Next time we go (if there is a next time), Kaila will wear a helmet.

At least no fights broke out. Perez Hilton blogged about some crazy-ass antics that recently took place at a Philly Chuck E.'s. Check it out. Holy shiz. Now that, is what you call a partay.


[Image via ratterrell]