I recently joined the PTSA. I recently got suckered into designing their end-of-year newsletter -- a 16-page behemoth filled with smiling faces, science olympiads, book bonanzas and bounce houses. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I joined. It's a great group. However, for some bizarre reason, every time I sit down to work on the newsletter, a perverted-rendition of "YMCA," plays in my head. Yes. Isn't that odd that something could be more perverted than the original? Trust me. What's even more bizarre is how little changing the lyrics needed to work.
Coincidence? I think not.
With sincere apologies to The Village People, I now present "P-T-S-A."
New Mom, there's no need to feel down.
I said, new Mom, pick yourself off the ground.
I said, new Mom, 'cause you're in a new town
There's no need to be unhappy.
New Mom, there's a place you can go.
I said, new man, when you want to share a cup of joe.
You can stay there, and I'm sure you will find
Many ways to amortize you time.
It's fun to stay at the P-T-S-A.
It's fun to stay at the P-T-S-A.
They have everything for Type A ladies to enjoy,
You can hang out and talk shit about do-nothin' boys ...
It's fun to stay at the P-T-S-A.
It's fun to stay at the P-T-S-A.
You can get yourself heard, you can have a good meal,
You can do what about you feel ... (within the bylaws, of course)
New Mom, are you listening to me?
I said, new Mom, what do you want to be?
I said, New Mom, you can make real your dreams.
But you got to know this one thing!
No woman does it all by herself. (unless her committee sucks)
I said, new Mom, put your pride on the shelf, (don't worry, you'll still get public recognition at a dinner)
And just go there, to the PTSA,
I'm sure they can use your help today...actually, the Carnival needs volunteers right away!
It's fun to stay at the P-T-S-A.
It's fun to stay at the P-T-S-A.
They have everything for Moms to enjoy,
You can hang out at Starbucks and for your child's awful teacher hash a plot to destroy...
It's fun to join the P-T-S-A.
It's fun to join the P-T-S-A.
You can get yourself heard, you can have a good meal,
You can do what about you feel ...
New Mom, I was once in your high-heeled shoes.
I said, I was down and out with the blues.
I felt no woman cared if I were alive.
I felt the school cliques were so tight ...
That's when someone came up to me,
And said, new Mom, take a walk up the street.
There's a place there called the PTSA
They can start you back on your way.
It's fun to stay at the P-T-S-A.
It's fun to stay at the P-T-S-A.
They have everything for Moms to enjoy,
You can hang out, but if you bring your preschooler bring toys ...
PTSA... you'll find it at the P-T-S-A.
New Mom, new Mom, there's no need to feel down.
New Mom, new Mom, get yourself off the ground.
PTSA... you'll find it at the P-T-S-A.
New Mom, new Mom, there's no need to feel down.
New Mom, new Mom, get yourself off the ground.
P-T-S-A ... just go to the P-T-S-A.
New Mom, are you listening to me?
I said, new Mom, what do you wanna be?
1 comment:
OH EMM GEE!
That is priceless. When does the recording come out?
(by the way, it's called PSA here and it is no different no matter where in the world you are!)
(( I find it humorous that it only took us both what ... less than 6 months to get suckered RIGHT back in? ))
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